Let's start at the very beginning

It's 3:30 in the morning and both My husband and I are on our laptops. Ugh.. I've been awake since about 1:30 and my mind has been racing. Anyway, I decided I should blog a little about myself and my family, so here goes.

I met my husband when I was 40. We met through a neighbor of mine, who worked with Mark. When she first told me about him, she said " he's nice, smart, cute and he's a single dad with FOUR children, two sets of twins, oh, and he has full custody of them." Now, I'm thinking, no flippin way, and who has two sets of twins, except those families on the Discovery channel. Anyway, after a failed attempt to meet each other, we kind of had a blind date for lunch. I remember we both kept our sunglasses on... Over the course of a couple of months, we talked for hours on the phone and found out that we had some really core things in common. We were both Catholic, came from larger families, and had strong family values. But, when you meet in your 40s, you always have baggage, no two ways around it. My kids were older, and I stupidly thought that it would be easier to meet someone when they were teenagers. Not so, It was not a welcome adjustment in my home. Mark's kids, were younger, barely seven and barely nine. They were like "whatever." Plus, it wasn't like he had them every other weekend, it was 24/7 and he worked full time and was pretty much both mom and dad.

I think we fell in Love rather quickly, that part was kind of easy, it's the friendship, the understanding of each other's differences, and whether you can accept them and help each other grow. You may think.. Really, how much do you need to keep growing at our age, well.. I learned a lot about myself in those years, and we helped each other through the rough spots of parenting, balancing careers and family, exes, etc. Our biggest challenge was our parenting skills, they differed greatly. I was a single mom, and I gave in like most moms, and I catered to my kid's every needs, I loved doing it. I had a curfew just like my daughter, and my cell would ring if I was late. Mark's kids on the other hand, were the furthest thing from being indulged or spoiled. They were self reliant. Don't get me wrong, my husband is a very loving father but, he's strict, and still to this day, if he says no, there's probably not a chance in you know where, he'll change his mind.

After about four years of dating, I was pretty much on my own. Erin was married and Tyler lived with his dad. I wanted to wait until Tyler was in College before getting married. On my 45th Birthday, Mark threw me a surprise Party, then we went on a cruise and he proposed. We got married in Sept of 05.

In preparation,I read every book I could find on step-parenting. All of them scared the crap out of me. I really just wanted to make a difference in their lives but it was a huge adjustment for everyone. We did a lot of reading and workbooks and even attended a seminar, which is required by our church. We decided beforehand who would do what, right down to cooking, cleaning, discipling, even finances (yuck). Even with all the planning, I struggled to make Mark's home, my home too. luckily, the kids (most of them) adapted quickly and we established a routine that we stuck to, like a set dinnertime, sitting together as a family. Also, this was now my daughter's home, and I wanted her to feel welcome and comfortable when she would come and stay and she does.
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It's been three years, and I think for the most part we've worked out the kinks. There are some things and some feelings I couldn't of anticipated, even though I tried to prepare. I could of stayed in my beautiful little condo, that I had decorated and loved, where the only one I had to worry about was myself. I ate a can of olives for dinner and would watch whatever I wanted on TV, do only my laundry, and run my dishwasher maybe once a week. I had it easy... But then, I wanted to be married to Mark, and I wanted to make a home and make a difference in the kid's lives, and we have. The kids know i'm here for them. They know they can rely on me and I love that and take on the tasks gladly. And my husband and I continue to grow and learn with each passing year, He's really very good to me and treats me wonderfully. It's a lot of work, and I'm tired a lot of the times, but it's a good life with lots of love, friends, great families, and of course the icing on the cake, our grandbabies!!!