Give us a break, please!!!

We went for radiation yesterday. Mom had 1mg of Ativan on board. We get there and they say, " the treatment plan is not completed and they aren't ready to begin radiation." I asked if we could see the Dr. because Mom's tumor has doubled in size from last week. When the Dr. saw the tumor she again stressed to us and especially my mom, how fast growing her cancer is and that it is vitally important that we get started with radiation. She was talking about that they may have to increase the length of weeks of radiation and even mentioned the "C" word. She isn't real impressed with the Erbitux and wants to talk to the oncologist about it. We were told in the beginning that the Erbitux was to enhance the effect of the radiation but last week when we saw the oncologist, he was impressed that the tumor had shrunk without radiation to it yet.

I had noticed on Sunday when I saw my mom that the tumor had grown significantly even from Friday. I was very upset by this because I don't want my mom to suffer anymore than she has already from that piece of crap tumor. Anyway, they are speeding up her treatment planning phase of the radiation phase, which you recall had to be redone because they had to modify her mask to accommodate her so she could tolerate it. They are trying to assure she gets a least two treatments this week. Tomorrow we meet with the Oncologist, she gets a Erbitux treatment, I think, and then she goes to the dentist so they can fit her for fluoride trays. Since they are radiating her neck, it might affect her saliva glands which can increase her chance of cavities which could increase her chance of needing an extraction which just can't happen once the bone in that area is radiated..... More tomorrow. Please pray for my sweet mom.

Not Quite

So, even with 1.5mg of Ativan on Board, my mother was still not able to tolerate the mask needed for her radiation. They cut the mouthpiece out, and she still couldn't do it. So, they cut the whole facial part out and now she just has to keep her chin up and bite on a plastic stick. They had to perform another CT scan yesterday with the modified mask because they have to be able to replicate the same areas that need to be radiated every time. So, Monday we start again. I kind of had to have a heart to heart with my mom about being able to follow through. I know better than anyone about anxiety and not wanting to do something. If I could drive to Paris instead of taking a plane, I'd of already gone. Anyway, she was trying to make all kinds of excuses not to have radiation. I told her I would not allow her to make a decision based on her fear. They are trying to cure her and I am really trying to get her to understand this but she's 86 and tired and I can see that this whole process is wearing her down. I'll a little worried because since her tongue won't be as much out of the way, she'll develop sores and loss of taste which will probably cause her to not want to eat.

I'm praying that Monday she'll do better and that each time will get a little easier. The whole treatment lasts no longer than 15 min. I have computer training next week so the boys are doing extra duty. Thank God, we've been able to be flexible with our jobs. And, I have to say that the radiation techs are all so kind to my mother and us. I feel like they are really looking after her.